wH the philosopher: Isn't love something you decide?

I don't understand some norms or moral values or whatever you called it. They say you must love your family no matter what. Why is there such a rule? Isn't it something you decide?

Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying don't love your family either. I'm just saying it is one's freedom of choice and it should not be regarded as right or wrong in whatever circumstances. They always say you will regret it in the end if you don't. But could it be that because the whole world just always remind you that 'you will regret it in the end if you don't' ? It is like your brainwashed in to feeling it. It is induced guilt or depression.

Again, don't get me wrong. Its probably more depressing if you don't have a loving family than if you had one. I'm not saying its a better situation. But what if your family is there, and you don't feel happy anyway? Are you suppose to act like they make you happy? Just to illustrate a point. I feel its very much justified if you hate your alchoholic parent that doesn't take care of anyone, not even himself/herself. Stay away if you want to. Its a choice. You don't have to LOVE him. People say there is a biological part of you that will just naturally love that parent despite whatever he/her does. If you feel it, fine, love the poor bugga already. However, please be clear if you really feel it or your just being brainwashed by some warped values of society. If you don't feel it, why kid yourself? In the end, you will live with your decision. (Its an extreme example but just try to understand the point to it)

I do understand why such 'values' are promoted. Obviously, if family don't stick together, who will? So, fulfill your family duty but don't be depressed if your not particular happy with your current situation. There a lot of people out there that you can love and I feel even if it is just a few, you will find it enough to make you happy.

Everything is a choice. If you don't like/love somebody, and don't want to improve the relationship, if you think that it is better for you after giving it some thought (but don't take the easy way out), don't look back! ONLY look back if you think its for your own happiness, not some warped induced guilt or depression imposed by society.